i am slowly going crazy 1-2-3-4-5-6-switch... crazy slowly am i going 6-5-4-3-2-1-switch.

i feel as tho i cannot seem to get it together...being home and having more time is brilliant....but not so much when i feel as tho i accomplish nothing. i am back in that place where i don’t feel productive enough and altho the stress of too many jobs no longer weighs on me...i seem to stress about my lack of jobs just as much. i wish to relax...to sit back and take this time for me. i need it. i feel as tho it would be beneficial to make a plan....a *me* plan. a plan of action to accomplish all that i was unable to when i was so busy. the problem lies in my being unable to take things one step @ a time and i wind up going crazy wishing i could just get everything done all @ once. impossible i know.

change. the time is now.

just a little update. i still have not bitten my nails.....and truly i am amazed @ how all of a sudden i just don’t do it anymore. i feel as tho i have conquered something grand. if you bite your nails i think you will understand....if not, you may not. my nails have never been this long in all my life. not EVER. last night i had a horrible dream...more of a nightmare really in which my nails just started tearing off and peeling and looked exactly as they did before even tho i had not started biting them again.....YIKES. it has now been close to 6 weeks i think which leads me to believe that i have in fact kicked the habit.

impressive i know : )